Linguistically Fine ; Mathematically Unsound

Through an Instruction :

Through a Q & A :
Teacher: What is 2k + k?
Student: 3000!


Through an Expression :
"Students nowadays are so clueless", the math professor complains to a colleague. "Yesterday, a student came to my office hours and wanted to know if General Calculus was a Roman war hero..."


Through a Letter :
When the math professor's wife returns home from work, she finds an envelope on the living room table. She opens it and finds a letter from her husband:

My dearest wife,
We have been married for nearly thirty years, and I still love you as much as on the day I proposed. You must realize, however, that you are now 54 years old and no longer able to satisfy certain needs I still have. I very much hope that you are not hurt to learn that, while you're reading this, I'm in a hotel room with an 18-year-old freshman girl from my calculus class. I'll be home before midnight.
Your husband, who will never stop loving you.

When the professor returns from the hotel shortly before midnight, he also finds an envelope in the living room. He opens it and reads:

My beloved husband,
You may recall that you, too, are 54 years old and no longer able to satisfy certain needs I still have. I thus hope that you are not hurt to learn that, while you're reading this, I am in a hotel room with the 18-year-old pool boy.
Your loving wife.
P.S. As a mathematician, you are certainly aware of the fact that 18 goes into 54 many more times than 54 goes into 18. Therefore, don't stay up and wait for me.


Through a Story :
A mathematician went insane and believed that he was the differentiation operator. His friends had him placed in a mental hospital until he got better. All day he would go around frightening the other patients by staring at them and saying "I differentiate you!"

One day he met a new patient; and true to form he stared at him and said "I differentiate you!", but for once, his victim's expression didn't change. Surprised, the mathematician marshalled his energies, stared fiercely at the new patient and said loudly "I differentiate you!", but still the other man had no reaction. Finally, in frustration, the mathematician screamed out "I DIFFERENTIATE YOU!"
The new patient calmly looked up and said, "You can differentiate me all you like: I'm e to the power of x."


Through Some Pick Up Lines :
- Are you a differentiable function? Because I'd like to be tangent to your curves!
- You and I would add up better than a Riemann sum.
- My love for you is a monotonic increasing function of time.
- I am equivalent to the Empty Set when you are not with me.


Okay, a pretty lame entry today. :P


- - - - - - - - - -



有一位圣者这么说：

你虽然说你觉得自己在学着去感谢你的敌人、感谢反对、感谢破坏，可是你并没有改良、没有反省、没有再造，那么你的感谢是口头的、是敷衍的。这样的感谢只不过是一个道理。

真正的感谢，是你真的原意为对方来做改变，你才能够有所感动，你愿意为对方来修正自己，这样的感谢才是愈修愈圆满的。