Saying the “Right” Thing..

He intended to start off his lecture with a welcoming note. He saw some really familiar faces and he warmly said, “Oh, I see some students that I had taught last year. It’s really happy to see you all back here.”

It was immediately followed by some mini uproar of “protests”.

Erm…

The “problem” is he was teaching year 1 last here and he is teaching year 1 this year again. He was addressing to the repeats, telling them how happy he was to see them in year 1 again. Erps.. We know it sounded quite wrong, but we also know he didn’t mean that.

No doubt, I also try to be careful of what I say. But in many instances, I still say the “wrong” thing.

For instance, a few weeks ago, I learnt that she just came back from a holiday from Japan recently. She was happy (and proud) to share with me the photos she took over there. Certainly, I was just as happy to have the chance to view the beauty of the country, in her perspective.

I took time to view the photos and was delighted.

When I met her again, I commented whole-heartedly, “Mount Fuji is so awesome!”

She was furious and quickly added, “Out of the whole album, you only mention Mount Fuji??!!”

Erm…

The problem is before she passed the photos to me, she said, “Not much scenery leh, I had taken shots of mainly people.”

Indeed most of her photos were mainly her and him. It was funny to see him sticking out his tongue as if he was about to sweep it between his lips from left to right. It was interesting to see her making monkey-faces while posting for a shot or two. Plus, plus, plus..

But please remember the entire album (of easily over five hundred photos) is either of him, of her or of both of them together (with different backgrounds) and I commented on Mount Fuji first and only, which is not even the main subjects, but just a background behind them. I obviously missed the main characters, and she was offended.

Haha.. I am kidding, she was only acting furious and acting being offended.

But somehow she reminded me some “right” ways of saying things. ;-)

This is such a small case, I know.
I wonder how many people I had unintentionally (but genuinely) hurt,
for saying the “wrong” things…
for asking the “wrong” questions…

Yes, I have always tried to amend the "wrongs".

What if the chance may not be given? Mm...

- - - - - -



- - 洁癖 - -

小和尚把地上的字纸捡起來，先去洗了手。
又照照镜子，洗了脸；再把衣服脱下来，洗了一遍又一遍。

「你这是在干么啊？你洗来洗去，已经浪费半天时间了。」
老和尚问。

「我有洁癖！」
小和尚又说：
「我容不得一点脏，您没发现吗？
每个施主走后，我都把他坐过的椅子擦一遍。」

「这叫洁癖吗？」
师父笑了笑，接着说：
「你嫌天脏、嫌地脏、嫌人脏，
外表虽然干净，內心反而有病，是不洁净了。」

An Issue with Edumail …

Every well-established organisation have their own emailing system, it seems. In other words, if I am from company/organisation XYZ, very likely my email will be like

nanzi@xyz.com.sg
or
nanzi@xyx.org.sg
or

You know.. erm.. something along this line.

Some people told me, when they first join a company they like, they will be eager to receive their personalised email. They told me that will be a way of demonstrating acceptance (by the company) and a sense of identity is there.

Lately, I’m really not too impressed with Edumail.
We could be happily preparing an email and when we are indeed ready … heh… we click on button 「 Send 」 and is only greeted by the message :

What?! We have a system that is “shutting-down” on us, when we are in the midst of using it? Mm.. Okay, I understand if we were to log in the system and left it untouch for a long time, and that message were to appear upon any engagement with the system, then fine, I would appreciate the security sense. But.. now.. mm..

Fine. (Not too fine, actually.) We then try logging in again. I mean, we were just following the instruction to "log in again". Very likely it will not be successful. More likely, we will be further greeted by another message :

Wa! Maybe I should be more understanding. They must be doing some kind of very regular maintenance without prior notice. The workforce for this organisation must be really big and erm.. hence the system is more difficult to manage.

A silly thought crossed my mind. Maybe we can all just do some collaboration with bigger names like Yahoo Mail or Gmail to communicate instead. Haha..

Of course, we know Yahoo Mail and Gmail have much much more clients than Edumail, yet.. er ..

- - - - - - - - - -



- - 完美 - -

小和尚坐在地上哭，满地都是写了字的废纸。

「怎么啦？」老和尚问。

「写不好。」小和尚回答。

老和尚捡起几张看：
「写得不错嘛，为什么要扔掉？又为什么哭？」

「我就是觉得不好。」
小和尚继续哭： 「我是完美主义者，一点都不能错。」

「问题是，这世界上有谁能一点都不错呢？」
老和尚拍拍小和尚：
「你什么都要完美，一点不满意，就生气，就哭，这反而是不完美了。」

Offer to Share an Umbrella, I should

I was at point A (sheltered), about to cross to point B (shelter). But the pathway between the two points was fully exposed to elements. It was raining pretty heavily, but I was armed with a reasonably big umbrella.

Before making the cross, I hesitated and pondered quite a while. After which, I set the umbrella opened and I walked off. Although I reached point B clean and dry, I somewhat felt tainted and dampened.

The images of people still waiting at point A (and who must have wished to cross to point B) flashed through my mind. They were waiting for the rain to get less heavy. Their wait seemed endless, if you know the weather yesterday. I am thinking now that I could have at least offered someone to cross with me, sharing my umbrella. Heh..

Frankly, during my hesitation I thought too much. My first thought was whether or not to offer to the guy (to my left) nearest to me or to the lady (to my right) with loads of groceries purchased. My second thought was what happen if they were to reject my offer flatly or to return me a suspicious stare?

Am I really so uncomfortable about being “rejected”? Silly me have somewhat become quite complicated in thinking, haven’t I? Maybe I should just learn to leave my feeling aside sometimes. Thick skin a little bit, never mind. Certainly those people waiting there hope to be home sooner. I would have felt grateful if someone were to offer to share an umbrella with me under such situation. How ________ (sorry, I am lost of words) they must have felt to see me walking off alone with such a big umbrella…

I think I will react differently next time. I shall rehearse : “Hi, you wanna cross over there? We could share an umbrella if you don’t mind.”

Coincidentally, this morning I was wakened by a dream, in which I was stranded somewhere because of the rain and *someone offered to share an umbrella with me to cross over from one point to another. Yes, it was offered by *someone I thought I know well quite, but have so carelessly "offended". Well… Still felt thankful for that simple offer in the dream and hope *someone continues to do well.

- - - - - - - - - -

Why Are You Late??!!

A new colleague of mine was conducting a lecture. I was free and thought of dropping by to support him. I delayed a bit, only thinking of giving him more time to feel more settled. So effectively, I was about 10 minutes late.

I entered the lecture venue from above. When I entered, he immediately noticed me. No, I didn’t make him nervous. Instead, he glanced confidently at me and sternly blurted, “Why are you late??!!” in front of the whole lecture venue. Physically, I froze (literally). Mentally, I exploded in laughters.

It took him about 3 seconds to notice I look somewhat familiar and so he quickly added, “Sorry, I thought you are a student.” A slight uproar of laughters in the lecture venue followed. Haha..

Oh, I was wearing a common college-theme-polo-tee. This explains the confusion caused. Haha.. Still, I choose to interpret the whole event as a compliment. :P

But of course one added, 「诈看之下，真的很像学生」。
I know the emphasis is on 「诈看之下」 的「诈」。;o)

How can I further deny, when my age divided by their (the current *little pals’) age is already a number strictly more than 2??!! Mm…

I still feel like laughing. :o)

- - - - - -



有一位圣者这么说：

活出真意义，短暂也甜蜜！

How They Introduced Themselves ...

Yesterday, I was in a class (not my class, as I was just a stand-in) and there was supposed to be an ice-breaker. As a starter, the OGLs applied the simplest idea of requesting each and every *little pal to introduce themselves.

It went on pretty smoothly. But I was quite startled when the fifth introducer spoke. He said, “I’m so-and-so, I was from what-and-what Secondary School and I’m a repeat.”

He was smiling a little when he said “I’m a repeat.” He wasn’t facing the rest and so it wasn’t exactly that kind of friendly smile, it was more like he was smiling at himself. It seemed like he was brave enough to admit it, to admit his failure to everyone, but at the same time, the voice went a little softer and the pace of speech a little hesitant when those words were uttered.

After that confession, the pause was slightly longer than usual before the next introducer spoke. I was just a little concerned. I didn’t want him to feel inferior, I didn’t want the class to view him too differently. I think I tried saying something that loosened the atmosphere slightly. I couldn’t remember my exact words though.

There are 3 repeats in the class, and because the first one ended his introduction that way, the other 2 followed and ended their introduction “I am a repeat also.” Mm.. Same smile, comparable tone, similar hesitation..

Towards the end of the day, I met two of the three again. I felt that I needed to talk to them, although I also didn’t know what to talk to them in the first place. Tricky. Of course, I was not teaching them how to “introduce themselves”. I was more concerned about the things behind those same smile, comparable tone, similar hesitation … I just somehow sensed that deep within they don’t feel too-right.

I was trying to say something, yet pretty worried that I might say the wrong thing. *cold sweat man..

Some minutes past…

One of them said “thanks” merrily before taking her leave. This time, the smile was obviously of a different class. Really nice. The other remained to talk more about my teaching subject. He seems more ready to go. I felt more at ease.

I don’t remember their names now and the images of their face are also beginning to fade away. But I do remember the feel of seeing that parting smiles of theirs. :o)

I think I can be quite kapo. Heh...

- - - - - - - -



有一位圣者这么说：

一个好的领导者是一个最好的被领导者。

他们说他们有傲慢

At times, I had noticed they weren’t in the best of mood. And that seriously affect the way they communicate with the others around them. Their tones will be different, their attitude clearly demonstrated and they just want things to be done the soonest and leave the scene just as fast.

One fine day (on different day for different people), they explained.

She said,
「我的心中有太多的傲慢。
我会很想把事情做好。
但我所做的每一件事都想要得到上司、
同事、朋友的注意、认同与肯定。
哪怕只是一句简单的赞许。
如果什么都没有表示的话，
我的意志会失落。
内心也可能会不满于有关的当事人。」

He said,
「我的好胜心也很强。
他人能做到的，
只要我用心的话，
我相信我也可以。
如果我不断努力，
但却一直只是看到别人总是锋芒毕露、独占鳌头，
而自己则是仍然默默无闻、一筹莫展，
我内心的滋味总是不会太好受。」

Another one was in tears when he mentioned,
「你知道吗？
其实我一直都很讨厌你。
我相信你也注意到我对你讲话的语气很不好。
我根本就是故意对你不理不睬。
你知道为什么吗？
我嫉妒你！
你的出现有一种威胁。
在那么短的时间，
你所学的就已经超越了我，
又一直得到上方的公开认同和继续提拔。
我内心真的很不好受。」

- - - - - - - -

他们说他们有傲慢、好胜、嫉妒之心，我们有吗？
不要否定的那么快。
多多少少，我相信每一个人都会有！
但它们不一定很明显、它们可以很隐微。
如果你想要有自觉的话，
你要在你的心灵深处在挖深一点。

他们都挖到了，
也愿意勇敢的来面对、
也愿意下定决心的来改。
他们的前程相信会更加坦然、更加自在、更加光明。
恭喜他们！

You still don’t believe you have a little tinge of that self-conceitedness, egoistism, pretentious, proudness, snobbishness, jeolousy ... ???
I may not have used the right words here, though.

Let’s see...
Remember the times (highly imaginative... 如有雷同纯属巧合) ,

- When we walk past a worker clearing the rubbish bins, we held our breath, use our fingers to pinch our nose, walked past him quickly with our head held high, not even want to look at his direction. Who is he to us? Do we know what a kind service he is providing us? Does he not deserve a more thankful nod from us, instead? What actually went through our heads when we tell little children, "You better study hard, if not next time you will be cleaning toilets and clearing rubbish bins, just like him?"

- When someone was being praised (or awarded), we wondered why. Instead of rejoicing with him, we wondered why he was getting the attention when we had (or could have) done better.

- When someone had done something not-too-right, were we too fast in accusing, reprimanding, without listening to any possible explanation? We may go “how can he...?!” , “how can she...?!” , “how can you...?!” Yes, we may go quite hard on that wrong-doer, forgetting we can err too. We seem to only allow ourselves to make mistakes.

ETC…

Haha... I shall not bore you too much... I shall then leave it to you to continue to imagine...

- - - - - - - - - -

A Young … An Old …

I was in a queue and I noticed someone staring at me. I glanced over. OMG, what a pair of innocent eyes! The stare (glance or look) that I received was from a young child, still seating in a pram. I smiled to the child, and the smile was reciprocated. I will remember that smile of his for long.

That’s how a young child will look at you, I guess. And if we were to return the glance, our eyes will basically be locked to each other. Don’t expect the child to shy away, he or she will only look at you more curiously, as if inspecting every pores of yours, as if seeing through you.

Frankly, I just like to look at the eyes of a child. They spell innocence that I should re-learn from, because I was a child before ; they signify purity in the state of mind that I have to re-gain, because I was a child before …

我们也曾经年轻过…

- - - - - -

In the same day, I was in another queue. There was an old man right in front of me. He bought only simple things but I can see that he struggled quite a bit just to get the right sum of money in coins to pay the cashier.

When he turned and was walking away, I noticed immediately from his side view that I know this man. He is a friend of my parents well before I came to this world. He was articulate and his Chinese calligraphy was really good. Pardon me for using the past tense to describe his qualities, for I know he was down with some serious illnesses some time ago and was troubled by many family issues. His eyes are now a little cloudy and his body frame seemingly fragile.

He continued to walk slowly away, while I was contemplating whether to call him or not. He wouldn’t have remembered me anyway, I thought. The next moment, the cashier asked me to pay up! Mm..

随着岁月的流逝，我们也会渐渐的老化 …

- - - - - -

From our youth to our present, what have we learnt?
成长的过程，会不会让我们学习到什么？
同时，我们会不会觉得好像失去些什么？

From our present to our elderly future (inevitably), will we be applying what we have learnt?
老化乃是自然的现象，它一点都不可怕。
我们是否当要注意，在渐渐老化的当儿，
我们心灵的素质也是否有逐渐地提升呢？

如果生命是一本乐谱，谱曲者究竟是谁？

- - - - - -

简单的感动 s s s …

He apologetically said, “Sorry, the vegetarian store is no longer operating. We are trying to find a replacement.”

His very casual comment only left me stunned.

Sorry? Erm… I don’t expect that humbling apologetic tone from him. Don’t get me wrong. I am not surprised that he can be that humbling, but I was rather taken aback that he takes it as his problem or responsibility.

Maybe it’s that little demonstration of concern for each other that gives the worldly stay a more pleasant one.

- - - - - -

I was walking along the walkway towards the college. This *little pal, S, happened to be walking towards me. We knew each other (as he was in one of my classes for about 2 weeks) and we exchanged smiles.

His first few words were, “Mr Nanzi, H said he misses you very much.”

I playfully uttered (feeling a little shy at the same time), “Don’t bluff lah. This H must be having hell of a good time and would have forgotten all about the college related stuff.”

S, very quickly added, “Really. Really. He said so.”

Erm.. Haha..
Actually, I miss H and his class quite a bit. Just that I’m not that expressive.

Just a moment ago, I have decided to contact H directly. =)

- - - - - - -

This R is already in his first year in university. He dropped by the college today just to meet up with his teachers.

He must be pleasantly surprised that my first greeting words to him were “Happy Birthday!” =)

- - - - - - -

Sometimes, I think it just feels quite nice to be remembered (or to be missed). And these people actually tell you (and others) so. Mm..

- - - - - - - - - -



A 问 B ： 你能原谅我吗？

B 答 A ： 你要我原谅你？可以！
不过你先要原谅你身边所有的人，包括你的敌人。

There may be times we have done the things not-too-right and dearly hope to rectify. We hope to be forgiven. At the same time, we may want to look into how forgiving we actually are. Mm…

String Attached?

See if you can identify the difference(s) in the following two pictures.

The first picture :

The second picture :

Yes, string attached removed!!
Look more pro right! :p
See how I deceive myself.
Nevertheless, enjoyed the little fun with Photoshop.

黄昏时分，众友相聚，在小巷口碑还蛮不错的小餐厅。
菜色多类，下口润胃，自然地脸上写着满意与好滋味。
闲话家常，笑声阵阵，就这样轻松地度过着美好时光。
没有忘记，调好嗓子，大伙儿也临场为他唱段生日歌。
转眼瞬间，夜色深沉，眼帘虽沉重但心里肯定是欣慰。

- - - - - - - - - -



有一位圣者这么说：

改变不必大，但求真；落实不必多，但求精。

26 December of Recent Years : If We Remember…

The date just crossed my mind, and some events just re-surfaced...

26 December, 2003
- The Bam earthquake occurred around the city of Bam in the southeast of Iran. The number of victims was officially declared to be more than 25000. Also more than 50000 people are declared to be injured and about 100000 people remain homeless.

26 December, 2004
- Great earthquake off the west coast of northern Sumatra Island in Indonesia resulting in tsunami in South-East Asia. Many many lives were lost or went missing and many many homes were devastated. We know what would have happened (to us) if the epicenter were to move slightly upwards.

26 December, 2006
- Malaysia had been displaced by the worst flooding in the area.
- Taiwan : Earthquake severing major submarine fiber-optic communications cables. The epicenter was predicted to be in the smack of a city centre, but somehow (for the good of mankind, I guess) it shifted off to the ocean floor, minimizing casualities to the minimum.

26 December, 2007
Of course, I am not making any prediction and I only hope nothing of that sort will happen.
Not on this day, not on any other day. But…

Of course, many good things happened on 26 December and many not-so-good things happened on other days too.

Oh, how can I forget?
Happy New Year.
May your year ahead be a joyous and meaningful one. :o)

- - - - - - - - - -



有一位圣者这么说：

不必借外在的光来光明自己，
要点亮内心的心灯来照耀众生。
也不必等到明日的旭阳来光耀大地，
先用自己的慧日来破除黑暗。