What if someone tells you that you only have xx (just some simple number any kid can count with their hands) number of days left?
I mean when you know your days of mortal existence is numbered.
In a dream last night, I was "told" about it. It was so real. Maybe, I will be truly "disappearing" soon.
There wasn't panic on my side. I was even composed enough to clarify where I will be transcend to. Heh.. It pretty much seems like I'm ready to go? Not really. Perhaps, I have learnt to accept things (however dark) when it comes along. Anyway, an answer was readily given to my clarification, but it’s not important to mention it here.
I did give a silent sigh in my heart, not because of the "answer". It was more like there are still things I have planned out but yet to be fulfilled. They aren't big plans anyway. But the little sense of lost is there.
Some thoughts were swirling calmly in my head..
- Why I spent so much time on...
- Why didn't I move in that direction set by...
- How many people have I lead...
- What about the travel plan I promised S...
- Why wasn't I more forgiving towards...
- How am I going to face...
- I have yet to hear from him...
- and many other thoughts..
It really becomes more real that..
Tomorrow doesn't belong to us. Not even today, for we don't know what's coming up in the next moment. Perhaps, only the current moment belongs to us. So how do we want to use the time now? We decide.
We may also ask ourselves :
- How many important and urgent things we put aside due to our laziness?
- How many times we procrastinated vital issues because we chose to indulge in other mortal pleasures?
- Do we really need a near-death experience to truly realize the value of time and the family and friends around us?
- Do we think there is life after (mortal) death?
- How many people leave this mortal world in a mentally-ready state of mind?
Anyway, if my existence here is already considered useless, I think I must be prepared to go, believing I can be of better use in the other realms somehow.
想一想，
这一生我到底作了一些什么有意义的事情？
还真的不很多。咳…
虽然觅得无上至宝，可是就是发挥得不好。
不敢怪任何人事物，摆明就是自己的愚钝。
如果就这么走了，我不能说丝毫没有遗憾。
毕竟，
所为不足，至今没有弥补完善；
因为寡虑，无心殃及他人不少；
心中志愿，仍然还未完成一半；
就是怠惰，狠将良心事放一旁；
一因一果，你我他网罗其中缠；
无论如何，我还是得甘愿承受。
Of course, I must be asking myself :
What would I be doing if I'm given more time?
Am I going to make every minute counts and make them more worthwhile, or am I going to squander the time away?
1 comment:
In my line I often face this kinda things. It is no doubt sad to the family and the client themselves.
Usually the family would start giving whatever the client want and try to satisfy their wants and needs.
The client might either fight on to complete their dream or give up totally, it depends.
I ever asked myself also, and I guess I would choose to end it even earlier because it is a torture to stay on and count days, I will fret out man.
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