Yes. I admit. I took a puff. But that was so many years ago. That was when I was only studying primary school. Lower primary, I believe.
I recalled I was staring at the unattended pack of cigarette. No one was at home. The voice “you are still young, you can’t smoke” rang in my ears. I couldn’t comprehend that. I saw so many adults were smoking and it didn’t hurt them. I learnt it was getting more expensive and therefore I interpreted it as something nice, since they were splurging on it much like a necessity to them. Alright, I didn’t like the second-hand smoke. Then why those adults keep smoking? I interpreted it as it must be exotic if we inhaled it first hand.
The coast was clear. The pack of cigarette was staring at me, or rather I was staring at it. The lighter box of matches was around. Magical combination. I decided to test out my hypotheses : “smoking is nice” and “inhaling smoke first hand is exotic”. I took a puff, just a puff. Yuck! I threw away the cigarette almost immediately. That was my first (and last) puff. Of course, I did a pretty job of erasing any evidences of my crime.
I became more curious as to why those adults keep trying something so bad-tasting and pricy. They kept complaining that the cigarettes were getting more and more expensive, but they never really stopped smoking.
When I became slightly older, I gathered enough courage to ask/interview the adults, mostly my relatives who smoke. At least they didn’t shun away from my questioning.
- What do to? I need to smoke to shoo away the mosquitoes.
I thought there were other equivalent means? How about mosquito coil? Maybe bringing around a box of cigarette is much cooler than bringing a box of mosquito coil around. Haha..
- Smoking can keep me warm in cold days.
I thought Singapore is summer throughout the year. How cold can it get? Anyway, I never doubt that smoking can keep one warm. Inhaling hot air what. But I think I prefer just wearing a thicker coat.
- When we work, everyone was smoking, so I picked up smoking.
Maybe it was a kind of status amongst the guys then. Cigarette was quite expensive. So if you had grown and already earning your own money, no one stopped you from smoking as long as you were still capable of bringing money back home.
And all agreed that at first they only thought of giving it a try, but unknowingly they gradually got hooked (for life). The health message never really reached them and when it did, it was “too late”, perhaps. They were so “hooked” and they can be just in plain self-denial. You can tell them how bad smoking is, they can counter the argument by citing which old “chimney friend” of theirs live to such and such a ripe old age.
But the “smoking-is-bad” message only became more aggressive. Heh.. Just look at those grisly pictures printed on every pack of cigarette. Somehow many more people begin to accept the message. They tried to give up smoking. You could see their trembling hands at times. You could see they were struggling to cope with the sudden cut in nicotine intake. Some gave up the effort of trying to quit smoking. Some only gave up because their health had already deteriorated so badly.
I see many non-smokers giving the smokers that kind of scornful look. I wonder if we really understand what kind of emotional struggles the smokers are going through? I am referring more to those "deeply-hooked" smokers who really want to quit, but find it just so difficult to do so. Those young punks who voluntarily picked up the habit just for the kick of it or for some kind of identity purpose may not understand this, I guess.
Have you seen some folks who leave their own house just to take a puff outside? Or at least, when they smoke, they will stand by the window side, just to minimize the second hand smoke for their family members. They know it's bad for the family. They know it's also bad for themselves. But they can't help it. How are we showing support to them?
They need support! It's an old habit of theirs that they can't kick. Save that scornful stares. We also have our fair shares of old habits that we can't kick.
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